Pulling Yourself Back Up

Its amazing. This week started as kind of a downer. Problems within our production company. Taking a class I wasnt excited about. Wondering where to go with my solo show at this point. Feeling a little at a loss.

And now its all completely done a 360 degree turn.

And that's the way of having a creative life. The roads curves, turns, zig zags, you move backwards and then forwards. But the point is to KEEP MOVING.

Which brings me to a quote I love in these moments:

"Artists....have their ups and their downs.....at times everything you do is wonderful....or you think it is.....and then you fall back down again. Pulling yourself back up is the most important part of your life...."

Indeed.

Sunnier Skies Ahead....

I have to admit....lately I feel like something is really missing from my life.

How can that be??

I'm in an audition class I've been wanting to take....and somehow, I couldn't give 2 shits.

Isnt that something?

I feel at a loss.

We've taken a few hits lately, the husband and I......disappointments with a project we got pulled into, (still) dealing with terrible former landlord. Oy vey. Isnt it something? You go into these relationships with other folks....with your good intentions.....and it just doesnt work out for the best. I wish I could go into it here with you, but at least here are some lessons I learned that may be helpful(and yep, you guessed it, they are redundant....):

1) TRUST your friggin instincts!

2) Sign contracts with folks on the projects you work on. Its uncomfortable: but DO IT ANYWAY. One of my mentor friends I met up with today told me that he ALWAYS signs contracts, even with his best friends. He feels, by doing this, he is protecting the friendship - so there are zero misunderstandings and the friendship will not suffer. Good advice.

3) Did I mention TRUST YOUR INSTINCTS?? Man oh man, this year has proven to me over and over to ALWAYS do this.

Sunnier skies ahead....

Virtual Dilemma - Part 2 (A.K.A. - She Took the Words Right Out of My Mouth)

From the blog of a yoga teacher I really like. THIS is EXACTLY how I'm feeling about technology!

The Technology of Heart



So I finally broke down and bought the Droid…Verizon's answer to Mac's iPhone. I felt like with the extra responsibilities and traveling more these days it was important to be able to send and receive emails on my cell. And it has this great keyboard to text my sister faster. I can take awesome photos, play Tetris or other boredom free apps. I can get directions to Sushi Roku, Santa Monica in seconds and use Google sky map to track the exact stars right above my head.

As I traveled last month to Los Angeles with it I noticed I'm hardly the only one. Everyone had their heads down engrossed in some sort of device. No need to say a word to anyone, my phone knows everything. Directions, gate changes, status updates. My life has been sized down to a hand device that takes care of everything. With a signature scroll the whole world is at my fingertips. 



And yet the world - the one that actually shifts and thrives around me is ignored. And I kinda miss talking to the random guy on the rental car shuttle. Good ole' small talk and connection with live beings. Before cell phones you actually paid attention to who was boarding your flight. You smiled at the little girl waving at the planes; interacted with your fellow humans, looked out for each other. 



And so while I suppose my Droid is here to stay, I'm deeply conflicted with the purchase. Aren't I now contributing to the further demise of humanity? Aren't I now cutting myself off from the world and my experience of it? Can I not just look up in the sky and guess which star is where? Because with or without the convenience your unique human experience cannot be replaced. Life happens whether you log on or not. And yes internet and technology is amazing, and does connect us - in endless ways. 



But with my Droid in my pocket this flight to New York I am reminded to connect to heart. To turn my head and notice the woman next to me in stunning blue; drinking her coffee and eating Ritz crackers. I am reminded to smile at her, even for a moment-and say hi. 


Keeping Your Happiness

"Are you happy?" the Guru asked his student when she was about to leave his Ashram and go back into the world.....

"Oh yes, very happy," she replied.

"You happy?" he asked again.

"Yes, Guruji."

"Happy you?"

"Yes, yes, happy happy."

"Happy happy?"

"Yes, yes."

"Good. Keep it.......keep it"

---- the Guru knew how hard it is to keep happiness, how quickly we give it over to petty worry and fear. Or how life can bowl one over with something that causes unhappiness. So when I start to feel unhappy......I tell myself this mantra about my happiness: "keep it.....keep it!!"

*From - "Sweeping the Dust" - written by Ruth Lauer-Manenti

Some Stuff I've Learned Recently ---

1) Always, always, always trust your instincts on people

2) If its too good to be true, it probably is......

3) If you've made a new "friend" and they constantly put down another person's work, or talk about friends they no longer get along with....ya gotta wonder......why all the negativity?? Hello! RED FLAG!!!!

4) Those that toot their own horn the loudest (especially about "art") and use a lot of pretentious words are usually insecure and full of shit. Careful how much you surround yourself with this B.S.

5) Trust your instincts about who your friends are.....you are RIGHT! :)

6) Dont be so angry/hurt that you cannot forgive. Just remember the lesson.

7) Keep it simple: 1 or 2 projects.....not 12!!!! :)

8) At the end of the day: love and your family and close friends are all you REALLY need. (hard for us ambitious folk to remember....but we do our best!!) ;)

9) Take advantage of every opportunity you have to get quiet. i. e. yoga, meditation, relaxing, hanging with loved ones, enjoying "alone" time

10) Write from the heart and about what you know

11) Dont believe the hype, no matter what your career is, about boundaries, age, what you "should" be doing, etc. Listen to your heart. Be brave!!

12) Keep it real, man, keep it real ---

13) At the end of each day, look at what you were able to do and be grateful.....not at what you "didnt do." Go easy on yourself!

14) Dont be afraid to give. But be weary of those who only know how to take.

15) Be big enough to take a step back and see the other person's point of view. It ain't about being right all the time.....

16) Always thank those who have helped you. Don't go taking all the credit. That'll bite you on the ass some day.

17) Try not to live in a "black and white" world.....Get to know the gray!!

18) Don't take it so personally! (tough one for me)

19) Do your best to be there for your loved ones - dont miss those moments bc you were "too busy."

20) Never give up!! There is a difference between giving up and evolving as a human being. Know the difference. Again, be brave - listen to that heart of yours!!

-- Can you tell I've had a couple of troubling situations to deal with lately?? Its been heartbreaking and disappointing - but on the flip side, I've learned a lot.....

:)

Virtual Dilemma

Sometimes I wonder if Facebooking and all the action on the Internet is a good thing - especially after what happened with that student at Rutger's University who was outted over the Internet.

It seems many of us (self include for sure) spend way too much time on line - we've created virtual personas - we replace picking up the phone and calling a friend or seeing them in person with an email, a lightning fast note on FB - and I just wonder how good this is?? Especially on the heart, the soul and our authenticity.

Is being online really necessary? I'd convinced myself that it was....yet I've always struggled with the sincerity of it.....and now I'm REALLY beginning to wonder.

Must we ALWAYS update everyone on our every move? What's left just for yourself??

Hmmmm......I'm a wonderin'